White Screen

Woke up to rain. First rain this entire week. And of course it was also my first day back at work. It wasn't very nice delivering newspapers and ads in the extreme cold and rain. Some people took pity on me and told me I was doing a good job. I didn't feel very happy. And a man outside on his balcony began telling me jokes outside in the pouring rain/sleet as I was gathering up the newspapers:

A man goes to a doctor and tells him to cure his bad cough. He can't cure it, and has to turn the patient away. The next day another doctor comes and tells the first doctor, that he cured the patient's cough. "How did you do that?", asks the first doctor. "Easy, I just used American Motor Oil", answers the other doctor. "You can't use that! That can't cure a bad cough?!". "Well, look at him cowering outside behind that lamp post. You really think he'll dare to cough again?".

Well, apart from the rain, it went well. It only took me 2,5 hours this time even though there were a lot of badly packed ads. When I came home I slept a bit, played a bit of piano (practiced Tetris a little, and once again forgot to play it for someone..), washed up the dishes and tidied up a bit. And I suddenly remember now that I learnt the English words "dishes" and "pillar" from my Dad when i was playing Rayman and Super Mario 64 on my new Nintendo 64 at the age of 8 or so.

Yesterday I also decided to either do Chinese or Japanese if I have time in February. I got an offer from an evening school that will teach me basic Chinese for quite some time for not a lot of money, and the school isn't far from me. And another school close to where my university is, is offering Japanese courses, but I'm afraid they might be a bit too early in the day for me to not have university classes at the same time. We'll see about it.

I can't find anything fun to do at the moment. I cheer up around other people, because I forget things, but that's about it. Can't you forcefully change your way of thinking? Or forcefully forget something. I once read about a person who couldn't forget anything, and in the end he had to imagine himself writing his memories on a piece of paper and throwing them into a fire, and that was the only way he could forget. Once again the question of personal change; taking a step in the direction you want to go. But what if you don't know what direction is the right one, or a wall is blocking your way forward? This time I think I'll leave it hanging.