Tuesday 2 December 2008

Longer yet, further still!

No real news today. Got to use some English again, speaking with some friends still in Belgium by voice. It was nice, but I'm afraid I'm getting a bit rusty, even though it might just be a result of me being tired = muchos gibberish.

I spoke with my mum today as well. She came home yesterday from hospital. I learned too that she had been in much more danger than I had been told. Well, at least there's no danger anymore. I'm looking forward to seeing her for christmas, even though she says I'll probably be a bit shocked to see her now. She lost over 10 kg lying in hospital and gets very easily tired now. But this episode has got her permanently off smoking, and she'll get better soon. So it's a good thing the worst is over now!

I've been playing a bit of a psychologist today as well for someone else, but I guess it's private stuff so I won't write about it here. Why do I so often find myself with so many other people's problems on my mind.. I'm not complaining, I guess it must be something good that so many people are able to confide in me.

It's my birthday soon. I'm organising something for the day. I need to find a bowling alley not too far from here and reserve two lanes for the day. I really need to pull myself together and get it done soon :P. My dreams are getting weirder too. I'm dreaming stuff about people from the university that really are "wtf" worthy. I even have dreams where I "remember" things that have never happened. It's a really strange feeling. I'm sure you've tried it in a dream. Where you're so sure that something has happened in the past, and that it's completely real. And when you wake up you think, "uhm.. where the hell did that come from?" :P.

I also found a letter I once translated from Dutch to Danish. I'll translate it to English tomorrow and post it here. It's kind of fun.

I'll end this entry with some cryptic thing I found in a document. I think I wrote it myself once. If you understand it feel free to leave a comment. To be honest, it's kind of scary and I can't remember writing it.. It was written next to two phone numbers that I have never called.

This is a memory. Maybe I'll write this to the end. Using others as a projection for my own mistakes is not the right thing to do. That is why I have to either succeed or fail with all of those consequences. I don't think it will ever happen, but all good things come to an end. I can't even realise myself. No reason for these feelings, but I can't control it. My future is very uncertain if I don't find myself soon. I wish everything was safe and known. This way I would always know the right way to do things. But it would be a world without excitement, I guess. But do I really need that? Some would say yes. Because their excitement is generally positive. I don't like reality. Some day I have to face it though and it's slowly happening now. At least I'm trying.

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